<em>The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills</em> recap: Breakfast with a side of sunglasses

Because if LVP is going to be completely MIA save for her (now particularly apt) “kiss my arse” title card in the opening credits, and if we’re going to experience traumatic event after traumatic event without a real storyline in sight as we crawl toward the Reunion, then I guess the least they could do is give us a fancy French chateau to look at.Although…was it just me, or were the ladies having a very difficult time with the “concept” of “Provence” “France?” As they’re driving in from the airport, Dorit sort of whispers to Teddi like she doesn’t want Provence to hear her: “This looks like a lot of places in Europe—I mean, we could be in Italy.” And when they pull up to the glamorous chateau they’re staying in, Lisa Rinna says it’s “like Downton Abbey, but in France” which it definitely is not, other than being a large house. But for Teddi to keep making these declarative statements about how “we need to make it clear” that Erika Jayne wouldn’t say something like that, and for Kyle to say “I’m struggling to believe Erika wasn’t a little bit embarrassed by Rinna’s behavior as Erika Jayne,” when the woman herself is right beside them basically saying that she would and she wasn’t is a Stretch-Armstrong-level reach.How will this resolve?