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Why your kid might need new lessons in resiliency

National Geographic Society
National Geographic Partners
the Resilience Builder for Children and Adolescents

Mary Alvord
” Alvord
Ulash Dunlap
Nadine Araksi Silverthorne


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New York City

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Positivity     41.00%   
   Negativity   59.00%
The New York Times
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“Kids who can only see what can go wrong and don’t feel they have any control in situations are more likely to feel hopeless and depressed,” Alvord says.No matter what the sudden change a child is dealing with, the event is a great opportunity for parents to encourage kids to problem-solve their new situation.Alvord suggests parents ask their kids: “What are some options we have? “Each time they learn on their own, they're building that resilience muscle because they're learning to trust themselves.”Parents won’t always be around when a sudden change happens—and sometimes even if they are, they need to give kids the space to figure things out on their own.“I think overall the important thing is helping your kids understand that while [no one] can control everything, there are many things that they can do to improve their lives and the situation,” Alvord says.Kids who consider change as a challenge they can face—rather than an obstacle they can’t overcome—will be better able to navigate the situation.“When you think, ‘I can try, or I have dealt with change before, I can do it again,’ it’s empowering,” Alvord says.Dunlap says that parents can also help children feel like they’re taking back some power in an out-of-control situation by teaching them techniques to use anytime they’re feeling frustrated. “Those connections and support systems are critical,” Alvord says, “especially now, with COVID-19, when people are feeling more isolated.”And as new stressors arise, it will be normal for kids to slip out of their routine—it’s OK to gently remind them to practice the skills they’ve learned.“All of our coping skills are being challenged right now, but it’s never too late to improve,” Dunlap says.

As said here by Heather Greenwood Davis